Just For Laugh

Joke (1)

I went to the store the other day, and I was in there for only about 5 minutes.
When I came out there was a motorcycle cop writing a parking ticket.
So I went up to him and said, "Come on, buddy, how about giving a guy a break?"
He ignored me and continued writing the ticket.
So I called him a pencil-necked Nazi.
He glared at me and started writing another ticket for worn tires! So I called him a piece of horse s***! He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first.

Then he started writing a third ticket!
This went on for about 20 minutes... the more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote.

I didn't care. My car was parked around the corner.

I try to have a little fun each day. It's important. :P :D


Joke (2)

A lady walks into a Porsche dealership. She browses around, then spots the perfect car and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the fine leather upholstery, a loud fart escapes her. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and hopes a sales person doesn't pop up right now.


As she turns back, there standing next to her was a salesman.

"Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?"

Very uncomfortably, and to try and draw attention away to what she has just done, she asks,

"Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?

"He answers, "Madame, if you farted just touching it, you are going to shit yourself when you hear the price!" :lol: :lol:


Joke (3)

I GOT STOPPED FOR SPEEDING THE OTHER DAY

I THOUGHT I COULD TALK MY WAY OUT OF IT

UNTIL THE COP LOOKED AT MY DOG IN THE BACK SEAT

Have a nice day!

KK trip (KK = kota kinabalu) ^^

(03/01/2008)This is my first time to KK and i wasn't expecting much,but after the trip i known kk more better <=== "no wonder is in visit to malaysia list" By the way let's start viewing pictures that i capture in KK...

As we rush to the senai airport about 6am++ we decide to have breakfast at kk...This is one of the coffee shop we have breakfast

The food here is pretty nice but is much more expensive then JB

This is not a lavender shop,is a simple chinese coffee shop hahah~

This is one of the famous mee in there "Kam Lou Mee"

However i still prefer the next day breakfast that Lily brought us to a hawker stall...This is the local famous "Tuaran Mee" <== (must try if you visit kk)

After the breakfast we came to this famous kk mamutik island resort, i think here is better then the redang island

The water are so clear, the island is so clean and the island have alot of events to do

The water are so clear that you can see the fish and the fish can see you too

This is the third day where we visit one the shangri-la resort in kk

Here's some pictures i taken with nikon 5.1megapixel and treated as wall paper (enjoy the pictures)

I skip alot of pictures maybe will have a part 2??? Maybe lar.... If aunty jessie were here i guess she sure exceeds 200 photo's with ease hahah....

I AM LEGEND

Synopsis:

Robert Neville is the last living man on Earth but he is not alone - for every other man, woman, and child has become a vampire, and they are all hungry for Neville's blood. By day, he is the hunter, stalking the sleeping undead through the abandoned ruins of civilisation. By night, he barricades himself in his home and prays for the dawn. How long can one man survive in a world full of vampires?

The movie's premise is eerie and haunting enough to give you the goose bumps: New York City in 2012 is desolate and deserted. Rotting cars and weeds line the streets, broken bridges hang precariously over rivers, and herds of deer roam Manhattan, hunted by marauding lions - and one man and his dog.

The man's name is Dr. Robert Neville (Will Smith) and the dog's name is Sam. Neville is reportedly the last man on Manhattan - after an outbreak of a man-made virus devastated the whole population and turned them into vampires. The virus was supposed to be a cure for cancer (as announced by an uncredited Emma Thompson as the virus creator)

Of course, Neville believes he is not alone. The former military scientist, who is now immune to the virus, blames himself for this debacle, especially the death of his wife and daughter, and is earnestly trying to find a way to reverse the mutation. Everyday, he sends out a message on AM radio, urging survivors to meet him near the bombed out Brooklyn Bridge. When night falls, Neville returns to his heavily padlocked apartment alone, with Sam. They must hide from the flesh-eating creatures of the night! Is there any human survivor who will give him hope and restore his failing sanity?

Is not a action movie, is a Science/Fiction/Thriller movie. I like this movie very much because last time when i was a kid i will also imagine if i am alone in this world what should i do? Main actor will smith did a great job by showing his fear when he meet those unwanted things and also showing how madness he is when a human living with a dog for so many years. So i recomemded you all to watch this movie ^^

My rating (3.5/5)

............

Last few weeks i and my good friend enter singapore to catch a movie,before the movie start we were hangin at the vivo city roof top talking, but then something happen...2 young girls age about 14 to 16 approach us and this is what happen.

2 girls: Hey Uncle!

Me & my fren: -.-" what u want?

2 girls: Want to buy pen from us?We are doing some charity...

Me & my fren: (Tulan liao) dont want thank.....

2 girls: Walk away rudely without sayin anythin....

~ 5 mins later ~

Another 2 new face girls approaching us...

2 girls: Hello !

Me & my fren: (my tulan havent gone) .... yes?

2 girls: Want to buy pen from us?We are doing some charity...pls pls~

Me & my fren: (hmm...this one seen polite) thats now got people ask us liao...No thank.

2 girls: please please lar...

Me & my fren: Hmm....No thank sorry....

2 girls: oh ok ^^....

If this second group come ask us first i might buy from her,but too bad~call us uncle i will not gonna buy or do any charity from u all liao....Damn maybe next time i need to make up...

"Ari Ga Tou Mi Na San"means "Thank Everyone"

This topic is gonna be "photo's more than words" hehe~ This is the whole year that i most happiest day.

is my 23 b'day, thank everyone for coming

From left to right "Han sheng, JJ, xz, kang wei, sw, me, ying ying, lois and clark

"informatics friends"

"JJ1 friends" (the person on the left are not include)

-.-" Do you have to sing like this???

-.-" omg!!! (Sha Ji) kill chicken in chinese

me and JJ

I miss out my friend convocation, so i ask him to bring his costume so that we can take photo together, this is not a cosplay party haha~

Happy convocation "sw"

kammmm paiiiii!!! (kampai ice)

A little dessert that i take from the buffet

Thank My Friends, i enjoy all your accompany

The Bourne Ultimatum

Synopsis:
All Jason Bourne wants is to disappear but now is hunted by the very people who made him what he is. Having lost his memory and the one person he loved, he is undeterred by the barrage of bullets and a new generation of highly-trained killers. Bourne has only one objective - to go back to the beginning and find out who he was. Now, in the new chapter of this espionage series, Bourne will hunt down his past in order to find a future. He must travel from Moscow, Paris, Madrid and London to Tangier and New York City as he continues his quest to find the real Jason Bourne - all the while trying to outmanoeuver the scores of cops, federal officers and Interpol agents with him in their crosshairs.

Is another nice action movie "The Bourne Ultimatum" the story was so great because alot of things are unpredictable and you can caught alot suprise moments in the movie. From "Bourne Idendity" and "Bourne Supremacy" was very nice but the ultimatum was the best among the previous. He is a very smart and intelligent action hero (but of course he is once a highly train assassin) he think and react very fast, those interpol who want catch is still failling. To all those who havent watch previous bourne, i recomemded you watch it before you watch this, so that you can understand what the whole movie was trying to tell you.

Rating 4 and half out of 5 (4.5/5) must watch!!!

I dont think the violent scene are very violent, so anyone also can watch!

I was Lucky!!!

Last week when i was on my way back, 2 malay people walking secretly behind me as close as possible in the range that can rob me, luckily i was able to turn my head and notice it and i reacted quickly by passing to the opposite road...

~5 mins of walking~

Again he approach me as same as the first time to try to find a chance to rob me, but i was lucky to get away by turning my head back to notice it... So i was frustrate and suspiciously the 2 malay keep following me, then i once again crossing the road and see them walking straight ahead of me, ok find then i continue my way back, but then the came back follow me, so i know myself have been locked on by this 2 malay and i dont have any weapon or sharp things to defense myself, so eventually i walk in to a coffee shop to buy something and let them walk ahead first...

~3 mins of buy things in that coffee shop~

So i think they properly give up on trying to rob me, so i decide to walk back... After a block i saw those 2 malay guy starring at me and waiting for me at the opposite of the shop, In my mind (wtf these guys ain't tired after i avoid them so many times) . Alright then i decide to walk those places with alot people so that he dosent have the chance to rob me until i reach my home...Luckily after 6 mins of following back he decide to turn back and give up!!!

I can only said that incident i was lucky because i am not alert enough to notice that area around me, is my mistake... By the way hari kemerdekaan 50 is coming why i cant see a police car petrol in my taman??? I though they sent more police to Johor Bahru after the crime rate was increase last few months??? Damn it when we need them we cant see them~ Next time i consider to bring some sharp items to put in my pocket...Rely on police i dunno die how many times already (shit) ...

~Mesra, Cepat dan Betul~

I think is Kurang Ajar, Lambat dan Salah....

Anyway all of you out there please becareful ok??? And take care!!!

Minutes To Midnight

Alot of people does not know the meaning of "Minutes to midnight" actually there's a doomsday clock created by some scientists. It uses the analogy of the human race being at a time that is "minutes to midnight" where midnight represents "catastrophic destruction". The analogy originally represented the threat of global nuclear war, but has since evolved to include nuclear weapons, climate-changing technologies and "new developments in the life sciences and nanotechnology that could inflict irrevocable harm to the earth. The number of minutes before midnight, a measure of the degree of nuclear, environmental, and technological threats, is updated periodically. The clock is currently set to five minutes to midnight, having been advanced by two minutes on January 17, 2007. It means that if the doomsday clock reach to midnight 12 o'clock then this world/earth will die...

above the picture is a doomsday clock

Year:1947
Mins Left:7
Time:11:53
Change:--
Reason:The initial setting of the Doomsday Clock.


Year:1949
Mins Left:3
Time:11:57
Change:-4
Reason:The Soviet Union tests its first atomic bomb.


Year:1953
Mins Left:2
Time:11:58
Change:-1
Reason:The United States and the Soviet Union test thermonuclear devices within nine months of one another. The clock is at its closest approach to midnight to date.

Year:1960
Mins Left:7
Time:11:53
Change:+5
Reason:In response to a perception of increased scientific cooperation and public understanding of the dangers of nuclear weapons.


Year:1963
Mins Left:12
Time:11:48
Change:+5
Reason:The United States and Soviet Union sign the Partial Test Ban Treaty, limiting atmospheric nuclear testing.


Year:1968
Mins Left:7
Time:11:53
Change:-5
Reason:France and China acquire and test nuclear weapons (1960 and 1964 respectively), wars rage on in the Middle East, Indian subcontinent, and Vietnam.


Year:1969
Mins Left:10
Time:11:50
Change:+3
Reason:The U.S. Senate ratifies the Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty.


Year:1972
Mins Left:12
Time:11:48
Change:+2
Reason:The United States and the Soviet Union sign the SALT I (Strategic Arms Limitation Treaty) and the Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty.


Year:1974
Mins Left:9
Time:11:51
Change:-3
Reason:India tests a nuclear device (Smiling Buddha), SALT II talks stall.


Year:1980
Mins Left:7
Time:11:53
Change:-2
Reason:Further deadlock in US-USSR talks, increase in nationalist wars and terrorist actions.


Year:1981
Mins Left:4
Time:11:56
Change:-3
Reason:Arms race escalates, conflicts in Afghanistan, South Africa, and Poland add to world tension.


Year:1984
Mins Left:3
Time:11:57
Change:-1
Reason:Further escalation of the arms race under the U.S. policies of Ronald Reagan.


Year:1988
Mins Left:6
Time:11:54
Change:+3
Reason:The U.S. and the Soviet Union sign treaty to eliminate intermediate-range nuclear forces, relations improve.


Year:1990
Mins Left:10
Time:11:50
Change:+4
Reason:Fall of the Berlin Wall, success of anti-communist movements in Eastern Europe, Cold War nearing an end.


Year:1991
Mins Left:17
Time:11:43
Change:+7
Reason:United States and Soviet Union sign the Strategic Arms Reduction Treaty. The clock is at its greatest distance from midnight so far.


Year:1995
Mins Left:14
Time:11:46
Change:-3
Reason:Global military spending continues at Cold War levels; concerns about post-Soviet nuclear proliferation of weapons and brainpower.


Year:1998
Mins Left:9
Time:11:51
Change:-5
Reason:Both India and Pakistan test nuclear weapons in a tit-for-tat show of aggression; the United States and Russia run into difficulties in further reducing stockpiles.


Year:2002
Mins Left:7
Time:11:53
Change:-2
Reason:Little progress on global nuclear disarmament; United States rejects a series of arms control treaties and announces its intentions to withdraw from the Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty; terrorists seek to acquire nuclear weapons.


Year:2007
Mins Left:5
Time:11:55
Change:-2
Reason:North Korea’s recent test of a nuclear weapon, Iran’s nuclear ambitions, a renewed U.S. emphasis on the military utility of nuclear weapons, the failure to adequately secure nuclear materials, and the continued presence of some 26,000 nuclear weapons in the United States and Russia.[4] Experts assessing the dangers posed to civilization have added climate change to the prospect of nuclear annihilation as the greatest threats to humankind.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minutes_to_midnight